The big day was here. The hockey provincial championship was hanging right over all of our heads. It was the game my team and I had been fighting for all year long. From long hard practices on the chilly ice to grueling and dry on-land training sessions, we have been working too hard to let our nerves distract us from the provincial title. Although, sometimes in life the greatest challenges we face are ourselves.
Placing first in the league along with many other championships under our belts have made us undeniably successful. The Devils, we were feared and respected, but mostly met with hate. We had created a monster of fear that loomed over us every time we stepped on to the ice. The monster was waiting to strike during the game that meant everything. The game in which the prize was the title that officially made us the best.
Walking into the rink that afternoon my face wore features that were cold as stone, the pressure was never going to grind me down. Though sometimes being the goaltender can be a difficult test where making one error may result in devastation, my dreams were to close to allow failure. As I looked around the room I noticed the almost unreadable expressions my teammates faces bore. Some displayed furrowed eyebrows and creased foreheads, while others possessed sunken eyes and tight lips. It was clear that today we would require full mental preparedness.
Now that game time was only minutes away, I felt the anticipation of puck drop mount. I felt as if a weight had been dropped in the pit of my stomach, my eyes bugged out of my skull as I envisioned my team and I achieving our goal. My entire body radiated with the bass from the stereo, my thoughts turned to the motivational lyrics that were being spit out aggressively in a rap beat. My jaw clenched as my eyes focused on Coach A.J. who had entered the room. I could see the rewards of his dedication reflected in his eyes, his desire mirrored everyone in the room. I could never forget some of the words he had said before that game, "Think about everything we've done this year. We've reached our goal to be one of the two teams out of the entire province to be playing in this game. Well, we're here. It's up to you guys to decide what to do with this game, but remember when you step out that door that you're playing for the people sitting across from you, the people to your left and the people to your right. Life doesn't reward those who sit pretty and just watch it go by. So grab the bull by the horns, rip it's head off and piss down it's throat! Are you ready?"
"Yes!" the team roared back in unison, and we marched out of the dressing room like soldiers heading towards a battlefield.
Crowds of people stuffed into the arena erupted with screams, but I was deaf to the entire atmosphere. My pressing hunger to win overpowered all of my senses, and all I could hear were skates carving the ice, the puck making contact with the blade of a stick and bodies being slammed against the boards. With every movement there was a reaction from the crowd, but none was as mighty and humiliating as the celebration that followed the opposing teams first goal. However, this was insignificant to me as my complete faith rested in the hearts of my teammates. The first period came to a close and we returned to the dressing room as the ice was being cleaned of the scars we had left on its surface. I knew we weren't playing to our full potential, and as I sat down and scanned the room I saw thoughts of self-doubt dancing and circling around everybody's heads. They were letting the expectation to succeed eat away at them like a parasite.
The last half of the third period was upon us, time was becoming precious as the clock ran down. There were five minutes left and I wasn't backing down, competition seemed at neck and neck until we took a lazy penalty. Frustrated, but not shaken, I pushed even harder to defend my pride even though we were outnumbered and scrambling. Shots whizzed by in all directions deflecting off of my pads and cushioned by my glove. All shots were denied entry into my net until an unlucky bounce created the opportune moment for the stick of my enemy. She reached back, came through and the puck took flight. My arm extended but it was too late, I missed the puck and I heard the sound of the netting embrace the puck from behind me. Hollers of delight blasted through my ears and echoed through my skull as I watched the opposing team jumping up and down. In my mind it wasn't over, there was just enough time for a miracle. I looked to the faces of my teammates, behind the cages of their helmets their faces were broken and defeated. I didn't understand why they all seemed to give up. The play continued, but glancing at the clock I saw the seconds running down. As the buzzer blared my face became flush, my eyes dripped fat tears and my knees seemed to give out from underneath me as a wave of heartbreak overwhelmed me. We felt cheated of our destiny watching the undeserving opponents claim our prize.
I believe that to do almost anything in life, one must be mentally prepared. Our team has the capability to overcome our fears, nerves and exceed our expectations if we can achieve a state of mental preparedness and focus. The only factor that was truly preventing us from conquering the game was our attitude and mindset. A positive attitude and complete focus is often the most difficult state of mind to accomplish.
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